Flashback: Senior Year [Summation] Semester 1

I don’t know how fragmented this blog is actually going to turn out, but I’m willing to give it a shot. Senior Year was a HUGE part of my self-progress as a person, so I feel the need to include a cumulative summary of its events.

Classes –> Hamamoto’s English AP definitely prepared me in a way for college more so than other class definitely did. After recopying the entire Hamlet novel on notes, I felt justified to get better quiz scores. Ugh. Although I struggled with most of the quizzes, I think I did well on most of the essays, although my personal statement could have used a little more work. ahah. OH WELL!

–> In Civics, I adored Ms. Dand-Isselin. She was amazing. And a Republican. Beglinger & Econ…. not so much.

–> Culinary ARTS ROP. Omg, I cannot believe this class…. It was full of lazy gangstas’, people ditched all of the time… I recall telling someone I was Caucasian in the class. He said “I see the asian… but I don’t see the cock”. WTF.! Oh well, I pulled out an A, and didn’t learn how to cook at all, as my college experiences have proven.

–> TA. I ta’ed for Durand’s chemistry class and then his fact class. I think his FACT class was semi-friendlier, but in essence, I didn’t really feel the need to meet freshman as a senior.

–> Calculus AP. Horrible class. I hated Calculus. Pulled off 2 C’s. The teacher, Ms. Pham-Vu was super nice and understanding. Although, I felt ashamed, since both of my sisters pulled off A’s and 5’s on the AP test. Oh well :(. Oh yeah, and I recall doing a group project for the class, and DOING IT WRONG when I had to present in front of the class. I ended up crying. One of my only few times crying in senior year.

–> Environmental AP. Oh Durand. This was a fun class, and easy not to mention. Teaching little kids at the end of the year was a highlight too. It gave me a little bit of the ability to see myself being a teacher in the future, although that’s not really one of my direct goals at the moment.

I also recall working, from that summer to this point – at Popeyes. Quite possibly the worst job in the world. The bosses were mean, it was hot and sweaty, I got yelled at a lot, and I didn’t feel like I fit in cause all my co-workers partied and did drugs all the time. One time I remember spinning chicken in a rotisserie, and it fell out into the ground. I sneaked it back in to avoid getting in trouble, and cooking it burns off the dirt, right?!?!?! Right?!?! Oh well, I’m glad that’s over with now though, although I can’t say the same for my co-workers…

Here are some blog entries from senior year, which indicate I was quite an emotional senior. BAHAHA. :

September 7th, 2007

I attended school the last two days. Were they exciting? Not entirely…

In fact, this is quite possibly the worst year EVER. Freshmen year was a little more exciting. But more to that later…

Anyway, let’s review my classes.

1. Environmental, Durand: It’s an okay class I guess. Nothing special. Nothing too exciting. Not the worst AP teacher in the world, but then again, not the best either.

2. Psychology, Warner: Hmm… it was okay I guess. I feel a little smarter around non-honors/non-AP students. (I know that might seem a little bad… but it’s okay i suppose).

3. English AP, Hamamoto: WOW. This guy is crazy. And intimidating. One chair right in the middle of the class. And his quizzes. ZOMG. I want to shoot myself after seeing them. Well not really.

4. Teacher Assistant, Durand: Enough said. I know me and him have a feud, but it’s all in good fun.

5. Civis, Dand/Isselin. OMG! She is so awesome. Finally a Republican teacher who can brainwash other kids (I’m not being sarcastic). Yay.

6. Calculus, PhamVu. A little hard to understand, but I guess I’ll adjust. Hopefully. Gulp..

School is DEPRESSING this year.
I guess I kinda felt this way first semester of freshmen year, but even back then it wasn’t this bad..

Maybe it’s because I have no emotion attachments/obsessions to keep me going, but something’s out of whack… maybe I need to get used to it.
I have no idea. Get back to you later.

September 10th, 2007

I probably shouldn’t be posting a Xanga blog right now, as I need to study for English AP. That class wasn’t what I hoped for, but oh well.

anyway. big brother 8 pisses me off. I just can’t stand Daniele. Reminds me of spoiled people in real life that need to get off their ass and do something with their life. oh well.

I’m tired of thinking about school. I’m tired of thinking about life.
There’s just times when you think too much, and then it starts to hurt, realizing nothing is going to change within 1 year, within 5 years, within 10 years. Life is essentially an escape from misery, which will all strike us eventually no matter how hard we try to escape it.

bye.

September 12th, 2007

This week has been a long week. Maybe because I’m still adjusting to school. Either way, my classes are STRESSING me out. Environmental is easy. Civics is easy. TA is easy. Calculus is easy. & Psychology is easy. From deductive reasoning, you can figure out the last class. =] Going to school + working on the same day = disaster. LOL And chatrooms to discuss Animal Farm helped slightly as my quiz average rose from a 17 to a 20+.

September 23rd, 2007

The thought just hit me.
I’m alone in this house.
My siblings will be gone – one sister at Oregon University, the other @ UCLA.

I’m all by myself now.
And I have no romantic love interests either.

FUCK. self-destruction.

September 26th, 2007

After reflecting on myself through my college admissions personal statements, I feel MUCH better about myself. And even learned a few things about myself that I wouldn’t have known before.

So life is great.
Life is good.
Life is okay.
Life sucks.

I’m just saying quite literally. If the world were to be hit by a meteor, and everyone died, I wouldn’t miss it. I hope it doesn’t. But then again, Maybe it should.

I’m still trying to figure out where happiness is actually derived from. So far, life is just a bunch of repeated events that add up to nothing. But it’s not like I’m gonna bother to look for meaning in this pathetic life. We live. We die. The end. There’s no way in hell I’m going to devote myself to religious bullshit.

In the words of Lily Allen “When you look with your eyes, Everything seems nice. But if you look twice, you can see it’s ALL LIES.” In other words, people are not as nice as they seem. There’s a lot of lie and corruption in the world. Based on that alone, the world is NOT a happy place. But that’s okay. And the fact of the matter, some people are happy when other people suffer. It’s just okay for them to watch other people suffer. I’m not going to name names, but the fact & reality is that it is unjust that the world is predominantly amounting itself to something such as this.

In other news. School is going well. I’m not doing so well in Calculus or English. But at this point I don’t really care. I’m not here for the entertainment. I’m just here for the ride. And if I learn on the way, great! If I don’t, oh well. In the words of Bowling for Soup, “high school never ends.” Thus, it is not up to society to change itself. It is up to me to change society.

September 27th, 2007:

Hmm… pretty humorous morning.
If you were to “hypothetically” give blood, and they accidentally hit your bone… would all your bones fall down. and all your blood drip out until you are prematurely dead? yes.

So I was singing Hannah Montana as I exited Mr. Murray’s Room. “If we were a movie, you’d be the right girl. That I’d fall in love with in the end.” As I left, Jemeow ran after me and yelled, “Hey! That girl was asking why that guy was singing Hannah Montana.” LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL.

Bad: I did bad on the personal statement, but what else is new?

Good: I made ELC! lmao.

okay bye.

October 10th, 2007:

I can’t let that happen again,
Cause then you’ll see my heart
in the saddest state it’s ever been
This is no place to try and live my life.
STOP RIGHT THERE THATS EXACTLY WHERE I LOST IT
SEE THAT LINE WELL I NEVER SHOULD HAVE CROSSED IT
Stop right there. I never should have said that it’s the very moment that I wish that I could take back.
I’m sorry for the person I’ve became
I’m sorry for that it took so long for me to change
I’m ready to never become that way again.
Because who I am hates who I’ve been

So on Monday I did my English Presentation. I said “umm” five times. Guranteed -25 POINTS. LOL
Anyway, I’m glad I went first because seeing other people go make me less nervous. We all have to face getting up in front of the class.

In other news, Quizbowl has been good, VOC has been great.
Environmental is good. Psychology is OKAY, but kinda repetitive. Ap english is probably the most insightful class this year. TA period is GREAT. Civics is okay. Calculus is okay.

Anyway bye

1 2 3 4 Tell me that you love me more
Sweet days Long nights that was what my youth was for
Oh teenage hopes arrived at your door
Left you with nothing but they wanted more
oh ohhhhh you’re changing your heart
oh ohhhhh you know who you are.

November 7th, 2007:

I know I haven’t posted a Xanga blog in a long time, but I guess that makes it more special (PSSH. Sureeeeeeeee.]

anyway,
There are a few things I need to address.

1.] Life is going good. I think despite the fact that I’m bored out of my mind this year, this year is relatively STABLE. Unlike last year and the whole pursue-a-girl thing. Maybe stability works better for me. However, stability is quite boring. That’s why I can’t wait to graduate from high school and go to college – where everything will change. DUN DUN DUN.

2.] School is going okay. I need to improve my grade in Calculus and English. I’ve been doing better on the english quizzes, but I need to figure out a new means of studying for the Hamlet quizzes. Wish me luck

3.] THE WGA Writer’s strike affects every television show. I really hope the strike doesn’t last any longer, because if it does, it will delay most of the television I watch – which is scripted, serialized dramas. ALL OF TELEVISION will affected. If the strike lasts too long, 24 will not be on 2008 at all, and probably will have 2 consecutive seasons in 2009. Expect more reality shows too. (unscripted ones, duh such as AMERICAN IDOL).

4.] Holidays are coming up. Due to Veteran’s day I have a 3 day weekend. Next week there’s a late start. The week after is Thanksgiving which equals 4 day weekend. And the week after is a 3 day weekend, due to a staff development non-student day. It’s good. More relaxation + Reading of HAMLET which needs to be read by December 4th.

5.] Girls? Crushes? Obsessions? None. I think I broke out of the cycle after Amy Tran. That was one thing she was good for. Let’s hope she never reads this.

 

Get off your seat. On your feet. Raise your hands. Feel the beat.
Let it go. Lose control. Feel it in your soul.
Don’t you know what you can do if you have faith in you. Let’s not be invisible
There’s no one left. Life is good.

November 16th, 2007:

So about my wireless… I believed it stopped working. Yesterday I spent roughly 3 hours trying to Fix it. While doing so, I accidentally broke my MOniter. I tried plugging it back in. It was hot. I had to keep doing it until it was actually hard enough to plug in. Boo.

Anyway, I think I’m improving in English. All my grades are good this year, except for Calculus – MATH. I hate boo.

As for love, NO. I have no romantic endeavors, and I think I’ll stick to this methodology at least for a while.

 

Anyway, that’s all for now.
It’s November 16th. Am I allowed to listen to Christmas music yet?

January 1st, 2008:

It’s literally been 2 months since I’ve posted anything, so I reserved Xanga blogs for January 1st.

Thanksgiving was when I decided to start listening to Christmas music. This was a bad idea, for the time Christmas came, the christmas music got tiresome and repetitive (kind of like mainstream crap)

For Christmas Cards this year I made a video for roughly 20 people. Yes. Always try to outdo yourself. Speaking of outdoing yourself, I am filming my Hamlet video Thursday. It’s gonna be awesome.

Christmas was fun. I got animanics but a Hollister shirt from my brother. HOLLISTER?! WTF?

What I’ve accomplished this break: Fun, School, and Work.
After all, Work and play are never okay to mix the way we do.

2008 is coming. I don’t really have any New Years Resolutions. It’s not because I think I’m perfect or anything… I just don’t feel like making goals I know I won’t really strive for. It’ll just come when it’ll come. I do have one though. Post more Xanga blogs.

January 3rd, 2008:

I am filming my English for Hamlet.

My sister went back to Oregon today.

2008 is going fine. However, it’s slightly too similar to 2007. Time for a change.

January 5th, 2008:

There’s not much to say.
It’s a Saturday. Winter break comes to an end in 2 days, and that is QUITE depressing. Back to school. MLK day is on the 21st – thats about ONE thing to look forward to.

Well, have I completed all my homework?
Yes I have. I’m just stuck on a few essays, but that’s about it.

2008 is feeling good right now. I get the vibe this year is going to be much better than most. By June I’ll have graduated Rancho, leave all my friends behind, and by September I’ll be in College. Where? UCI? UCLA? UCSD? Whatever accepts me, I guess. No partaying in college though. I’m just not into that.
Winter formal and Prom. Not into that either. Graduation, I’ll attend because there’s a reason for it. A bunch of people dancing around isn’t quite appealing…

And I have work today. I’ve been improving, slightly. I’m nice to all my coworkers, slightly. And when I get home I’ll get tired again… slightly.

I’m not sure if I will develop a new obsession this year. Now that I know my flaws, I should be able to fix them. But then again, it’s just not that easy. These things just sort of happen when you have no life and nothing to do 24/7.

In television news, the Writer’s strike is still going on. And that is quite depressing. No 24 for 2008. =[ American Idol and the Moment of Truth come back, and House airs its final 4 episodes of the season (due to the Writer’s strike). [It comes back with a Christmas episode]

I don’t know what 2008 holds. Hopefully it’s as fun as 2007, because through all of the toils, investing my time in something fun was worth it and will continue to be worth for the rest of my life.

January 7th, 2008:

Not very fun.

Tomorrow lots of people will be going to the “Body Exhibit Fieldtrip” Good for them. I don’t need to waste money to see a bunch of dead bodies.

Life is going alright; Things are looking up. My Rite of Passage is no where to be found, and in 6 months I’ll be done with Rancho completely.

Good night.

January 9th, 2008:

So I’ve noticed I’ve only been posting blogs for every odd numbered day of the year. Maybe I’ll keep that pattern going for the rest of 2008. (BAHAHAHAHAH. Yeah right.)

Anyway, what’s up? Nothing much. The transition back to school has been rough, and I hate walking up at 7:18 in the morning and leaving at 7:30, which give me 12 minutes to actually get really. O_O.

So I’ve debating whether or not to wear the hollister shirt. It’s so brand name and conformist. To wear or not to wear? That is an easy question, the answer is simply no.

Any plans tomorrow? My pattern is usually the same, and ultimately never changing, NEVER changing.
7:00-7:30 : Wake up and get ready
7:30-8:00 : Hang out in Murray’s room before school begins
8:00-2:43: School.
2:43-4:00: Sometimes I stay after school. But most of the time i don’t…

Anyway, usually takes me from 2:43-5:30 to complete all my homework, usually till 6 if I have a lot (which is very, very rare)

By 11, I fall asleep without accidentally or by choice.

Alright back. In other news, JoJo was offered the role of the title character of Disney Channel‘s Hannah Montana, but turned it down because of her hectic schedule…. SO, JoJo could have been Hannah Montana, and Miley Cyrus…. which could have made her 3 people… Interesting.

January 11th, 2008:

To jock or not to jock? That is the question…
Next week, I get to compete with various others in “lunchtime activities”. Oh man this is going to be sooooo awkward. In other news, I’m going to winter formal.

Here’s some fun things to examine:
<Th3No0b> Im going to be the next hitler
<Th3No0b> Im going to kill all the jews and 1 clown
<RageAgainsttheAmish> why the clown
<Th3No0b> See? no one cares about the jews
<RageAgainsttheAmish> lmao

<link>once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ‘ hot  xxx galore’. While i clicked my fav’rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour, ” ‘Tis not possible!”, i muttered, ” give me back my free hardcore!”….. quoth the server, 404.
<hokage> *cries*, scary….

<Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.
<Raven> It said my password wasn’t long enough. 🙁

<Eticam> I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
<Eticam> And a girl asked why doesn’t it taste sweet then
<Eticam> When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
<Eticam> Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
<Eticam> The girl started crying and left class ^^

<tag> Ouroboros: lets play Pong
<Ouroboros> Ok.
<tag> |    .
<Ouroboros> .    |
<tag> |  .
<Ouroboros>    . |
<tag> | .
<Ouroboros>      | .
<Ouroboros> Whoops

<kow`> “There are 10 types of people in the world… those who understand binary and those who don’t.”
<SpaceRain> That’s only 2 types of people, kow.
<SpaceRain> STUPID

January 13th, 2008:

Yesterday I went to a VOC event… which was basically, we did nothing…. LOL. Park clean-up and BBQ? More like just a BBQ. Too bad.

And then I went to work after, which surprisingly passed by faster than the VOC event. LOL.

Today I shall review all 26 Hamlet essays.

January 15th, 2008:

I need to improve my English quiz scores. I’ve been scoring lower lately. I actually FROZE during today’s quiz. Ugh, I needa focus.

I’m so glad Martin Luther King Jr. Day is next Monday. Sometimes I just need a break. Also, I’m tired of school. Tired of everything. Tired of life.

The next time we hang out
My heart will not rest till then.

January 17th, 2008:

In retrospect, the lunchtime activities have been quite lame to say the least. However, I have had a little bit of enjoyment in doing them.

Monday was the “Water Slide” Contest. I lost that. Tuesday was the Musical Chairs Contest. I was the first one out. Wednesday was the Obstacle Course, which I lost both rounds of. Today was not really a competition, but rather a presentation of the nomineees basically. I got ditched by 2 escorts, but Rebecca and Tran were mine.
Tomorrow is the “Pie” eating contest. I use the term “pie” very loosely because they told me to bring extra clothes, which probably means it’s not really pie.

In other news, there’s this girl I like. A different one. She’ll never know I’ll like her though, and no one else ever win. As long as she doesn’t find out, I’m fine. But once she does, I am so screwed.

Friday I’m going to go practice driving, depending on if my dad has to go to work or not. On Saturday I shall go work at Popeyes with all the high school dropouts and Druggies. Sunday I shall help Tanya Tran with her video project and Monday I shall go to the Volunteers of Orange County event in commemoration of the reverend Martin Luther King Jr.

Next week is Review & Cram week, before the ultimate week of Finals the week after. Wish me luck.

And my pattern of posting a blog every other day has been effective, so I’ll do that from now on.

PS: The three funniest American Idol auditions in the history of the show:

I AM YOUR BROTHER: http://youtube.com/watch?v=SuH0v7GIIwI
STALKER SONG: http://youtube.com/watch?v=omfx3pVuzDk
NO SEX ALLOWED: http://youtube.com/watch?v=yERItkoWhpw

The last time I freaked out
I just kept looking down
I stu-stu-stuttering
Ask me what I’m thinking bout’
Felt like I couldn’t breathe
You ARE what’s wrong with ME.

January 19th, 2008:

I’ve noticed if you post a blog past 9 PM, it doesn’t get sent to people’s email until the day after. This is probably due to “time zone” issues. Frigging Xanga.

So, I did it. I finally deleted my Myspace. I have some partial reasons for deleting it.
1) I’ve been great at getting rid of all my romantic attachments/neediness. Deleting Myspace, which is virtually useless to me anyway, is a good step.
2) Myspace is getting so stupid, and virtually copying Facebook in every way. I shall use Facebook from now on, probably not too often though. No need to get obsessed over a new site to replace an old site.
3) Simply to avoid one person.

I just got back from work. I met someone Christian at work (someone who isn’t *GASP* a high school dropout). Then it finally struck me. Christians who try to convert you aren’t doing it being they’re close-minded, they’re doing it because their belief justifies it. They want to help others get into heaven and choose the right path.

However, I’m still atheist. But I should be more open-minded. Maybe.

And I screwed myself up because I accidentally like someone.

January 23rd, 2008:

John Mccain – Republican.
Barack Obama – Democrat.

That has to happen or this country is screwed.

January 25th, 2008:

[in response to Teardrops on my guitar Taylor swift music video]: The guy in that video is a JERK! Maybe it’s just my opinion but I think he is. No wait, I know he is.
So, nothing much has really happened this week. I got to play dress up for a few days, but that’s about it. My weekend schedule is currently Friday (nothing! relax, and some studying for Quizbowl), Saturday (Quizbowl UCLA Tournament. I MUST ANSWER SOMETHING. I FEEL SO DUMB SOMETIMES.) Sunday I shall do all 26 essays (maybe), and study for Calculus. Next week are finals and Winter Formal. Okay.

January 27th, 2008:

Well, well, Finals week is here!
One semester is almost done.
One down. one to go. Then, good byeeeeeee Rancho.

Wednesday: FINALS for AP ENVIRONMENTAL, AP ENGLISH, AND AP CIVICS. I’m guessing that’s hard day.
Thursday: FINALS for Psychology (pffttt…), TA (pfffftt), and AP Calculus (I’ll study for this one since the other two are wtf)

So Quizbowl was… fun. I heart UCLA. I saw my sister there. Oh, and Mr. Durand forgot the judge so my sister’s bringing it home.
okay bye.

January 29th, 2008:

They begin tomorrow.
I’m far from nervous.

Environmental. That class CANNOT be that hard considering how easy the presentations were.
English AP. I already prepared for all the essays so there’s nothing to be worried about. Hopefully the three I skipped won’t be there. Let’s play odds.
Civics. I need a 4 or 5 on the AP test. I think I can do pretty well on the multiple choice portion of the mock AP exam. (maybe I should study) NAH.

In other news, I got my tux.

January 31st, 2008:

Today, the semester ended at 12:05 PM.
And, while I’ll miss it slightly, I will still see (a majority) of my friends again next semester (despite a forced last-minute schedule change).

Here’s how I think I did regarding my finals.

On Wednesday I took an AP environmental regular test. It wasn’t really a final except for a bonus question that made us look over things. Blah. For English I think I did okay, except fate it NOT in my hands as proven by the fact that he chose one of the essays out of the 3 I skipped and decided not to write. Oops. As for Civics, I did well on the multiple choice section. A 50/60 I hear (with the deductions)! Yay. I’m probably going to miss Civics the most next semester, even though everyone else hates it. Ms. Dand is so nice and the class is so chill, but I’m also looking forward to Econ and a more Liberal viewpoint.

Today, Thursday, I took a Psychology final. That was way too easy. College prep classes remind me what is so BS about the academic school system. The gap between regular classes and HONORS classes is so humongous it’s not even funny. Finally, I took my Calculus final, which I probably failed considering how bad I am at math.

Winter formal is tomorrow. I have to go pick up my Tuxedo.

As for next semester, here’s how my current schedule looks:
1. AP ENVIRONMENTAL
2. AP ENGLISH
3. TA ROSS DURAND
4. CULINARY ARTS ROP
5. ECON HONORS
6. AP CALCULUS

Well, there you go. Three weighted classes (econ not being one of them). A switch in English classes might prove beneficial or it might doom me of the rest of my life (DUN DUN DUN). And culinary arts. Yum, food. Too bad we have to get our own supplies. Econ Honors. I’m slightly looking forward to Beglinger, but then again I’ve been slightly way too optimistic this year. Hopefully fate crushes my hopes down so that won’t curse me anymore.

Anyway, for February I’m going to post Xanga blogs on every even numbered day since this month ends in an odd number. See you on the 2nd!

———-

I continued making study guides this year, and am obviously not going to share them here. But I feel like incorporating videos I made from the first semester of senior year here. So here goes:

Goodbye for now.

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