In every relationship, there is a “reacher”, and a “settler”. The reacher strives for someone outside of their “league”, while the settler dates down because they are unaware of their personal potential. Whichever the case, it’s rather subjective to identify who’s the settler and who’s the reacher in certain cases, because the two persons can be in roughly the same league. STILL, it’s best to identify which one is better.
Pros for the Reacher:
1) The Reacher is with someone they could have never dreamed of being with.
2) The Reacher gets a self-confidence boost being with the Settler.
3) The Reacher can show off the Settler proudly to his or her friends.
Cons for the Reacher:
1) The Reacher is more likely to be insecure and jealous as the Settler is likely to be hit on by various persons.
2) The Reacher is often more clingy.
3) The Reacher has to do more of the work in “chasing” the Settler.
Pros for the Settler:
1) The Settler gets a confidence boost from being with the Reacher.
2) The Settler is complacent in the relationship, having someone that will constantly be “chasing” them.
3) The Settler doesn’t have to fear after a breakup – they can more easily find somebody else.
Cons for the Settler:
1) The Settler could do so much better.
2) The Settler is destroying his or her chance to become a Reacher.
3) The Settler will either be embarrassed to show off his significant other, or constantly have people asking them “WHY ARE YOU DATING THAT PERSON!?”
In the end, the problem with this type of analysis is if you ask a happy couple who’s what: if they love the person, they’d identify themselves as the settlers. If they truly love the person, they would believe that person is not only out of their leagues, but a gift sent from heaven, thus making the entire argument of which one is better subjective and VOID.
